The Martyred Mother Complex

St. Stephen was the first christian martyr. He was stoned to death because he would not renounce his love and devotion for Jesus Christ. That is as intense as it can possibly be. Not many people would sacrifice themselves the way St. Stephen did. But some mothers put themselves on the martyr block on a daily basis. Oh, they don't have to say things out loud for their children/spouse/friends to hear, no, theirs is the silent suffering.

Martyred mothers should be an international group with millions of members. I personally have been martyred on several occasions just this week. I put aside what I am doing and run to the grocery store to pick up no less than four items because my sons "are dying" to have them. So I go, no questions asked. When I come back from the store 25 minutes later because there was traffic getting to and from, all I hear is "what took you so long, we're STARVING." I just go about my duties as a mother and wait until I will be yet again martyred for the cause. Even my husband has put me up there on many an occasion. You know the response, "Mom will take care of it, Mom's great." With not so much as a lost step or bat of an eye, I'm there to do what is needed. We mothers do get a chance to sit down and debrief each other on our exploits in the martyr world. Whether its driving each of your children to their particular sporting event, fixing the computer so you can type up an assignment, forgo personal hygiene as long as everyone is taken care of and happy we will, ourselves, will be satisfied with the results. We do this out of love and my personal favorite, because we don't feel like listening to them anymore.

Don't let your children know your a martyr, they will figure this out later, when they are driving to the third or fourth assisted living facility with you. Helping you pick out your nursing home could quite possibly still be an opportunity to bond with your child(ren). So suffer you may, suffer you must, and then sit back and feel the wards of your martyring.